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Know what I hate? Mad-liberal cranks dissing national holidays, like Michelle Chen over at USA Today. Her headline reads, “What is thanksgiving to Indigenous people? A day of mourning.” I think she’s an energy-taking leftist attacking an energy-giving holiday, because I see kids excited to see grandparents, distant relatives cherished at a homecoming, and shopkeepers staffing up for Black Friday.

Leave it to leftist colleges and media to lay a guilt trip on everyday Americans by “de-colonizing” a national tradition. Because hypocrisy is rampant on the Left, I’ll bet Ms. Chen was tucking it in on Thursday. Case in point, Twitter was lit up Saturday with a picture of Chris Cuomo buying Christmas wreaths, hours after dissing the holiday on air. That’s right, he scolded his listeners for something he also celebrates. By the way, that’s the mean double standard that cost his brother his job.

Every American has something for which to be thankful, which is the IDEAL of the holiday. Chen calls the Thanksgiving story a sham because later hordes of English did push native Americans off their lands with deadly force. But NOT on an autumn day in 1621: those colonists were grateful, and those natives were giving. What she overlooks is the celebrants at the first Thanksgiving feast were living in their here and now, fifty years before the First Indian War.

There is no shame in celebrating a righteous moment that became an American saga: Wampanoag helping their fellow man and Pilgrims sharing America’s bounty. In fact, the Wampanoag did save the malnourished colonists, and the Pilgrims did sign a treaty that kept the alliance until 1675 (long after the last celebrant and treaty signer were dead).

What so-called liberals don’t get is that families, companies, nations, and teams are inspired and united by sagas, which are simplified to be understood by all. Children learn grandpa’s hard work built the family business. First-graders learn Washington’s resolve began America. Immigrants learn Dr. King’s bravery made equal opportunity happen. Because sagas mean to teach aspirational ideals, they don’t dwell on negatives (like…grandpa had a drinking problem).

America’s national saga is not the US History taught to college students. Rather, it’s the lone hit single from a long-playing album few have heard in its entirety. Why is that? Because the “first thanksgiving” story was one-of and inspirational, while the First Indian War was one more conquest and daunting. Do the “real history” wonks want to ensure first graders “get it” by staging colonial conquests on Grandparents Day?

The national saga needs a perfect past narrative to advance a perfect future outcome, without the clutter of sins. What matters is that an imperfect Columbus made a perfectly intrepid voyage and consequential discovery, and an imperfect Jefferson advanced the perfect ideals of “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” What matters today is what historic figures did in their finest hour – and a thanksgiving in 1621 is one such “finest hour” in US history.

I have noticed America has no statues commemorating boards, committees or mobs. But I see plenty of boards, committees and mobs (comprised of nobodies) outraged by statues of heretofore greats. Perhaps they mean well, but erase the man and erase the ideal. Ditto for Thanksgiving, for there’s no better ideal than giving thanks for what came before, and no greater waste of energy than obsessing over ancient sins.

America is quickly tiring of the history humbugs, like the far-left charlatans at the New York Times who tried to “reframe the country’s history” in The 1619 Project. Let it suffice to note they should give thanks to The Virginians (Jefferson and Madison) for first-amendment protection – or get life under Xi or Putin for Christmas. The last five years have been hard enough without Big Media pooping on their fellow Americans’ favorite party.

Thanksgiving is celebrated by 85% of Americans (source: YouGov). Further, it is “generally celebrated” by 90% of Blacks and Hispanics, and 97% of whites (source: Ipsos Poll). Those numbers are overwhelming, so why even roll with this cancel culture BS? Maybe Ms. Chen sat beside a rich Colonial Dame last Thanksgiving or Mr. Cuomo didn’t get what he wanted last Christmas. Who cares? I just know their holiday buzzkill reminds me of the “Ode to Billie Joe” (pass the biscuits, please).

By Spencer Morten

The writer is a retired CEO of a US corporation, whose views were informed by studies and work in the US and abroad. An economist by education, and pragmatist by experience, he believes the greatest threat to peace and prosperity are the loudest voices with the least experience and expertise.